There wasn’t even a discussion about who would care for Tavares when he was diagnosed with ALS in 2018. Eric, his partner since April 2016 and husband since June 2020, just assumed the responsibilities of being his primary caregiver.
As many of us in the ALS community know, caregiving is not easy, but most caregivers do whatever they can to make sure that the needs of their loved one are met and that they are well-taken care of during the roller coaster ride that ALS is. However, since mental health inevitably takes a toll on the caregiver, Eric made the decision to join a caregiver support group, not only for his mental health but in order to get ideas from other caregivers on how to better care for Tavares. Although Eric chooses to mostly observe and listen, he finds comfort in attending these meetings.
Despite the mental and physical exhaustion that comes with taking care of a loved one, seeing the impact of ALS on Tavares is challenging and heartbreaking for Eric.
“When Tavares and I got married, I knew that we were going to go down this ALS road. Because this has been a slow progression for him, I’ve had more time to prepare myself for everything that I’m going to be needing to do. For people who get an ALS diagnosis, not only does the person with ALS have to get used to this new reality, but the caregiver also has no time to adjust their mindset. Fortunately, I’ve been given more time to adjust and process all of this,” says Eric.
If Eric could offer advice to other caregivers, he would encourage them to not take anything personally and to remember the importance of practicing self-care.
Says Eric, “It is a struggle taking care of someone you love and it’s important to remember that they are struggling, too. It’s also important to remember to take care of yourself, not only for your mental health, but also because you can’t care for someone if you are unwell yourself.”
Read and learn more about Tavares’s ALS journey which subsequently led to his ALS advocacy on social media.
Comments